Master of my Own Ship

I was never lost but it has taken me a while to get here. The path I travel is long and meandering. I am building the bridge of fate whilst crossing it. My head is light because it’s filled with dreams and my hands are full because reality takes a lot of work.

I am often asked will I ever return back to where I used to be? The answer lies where my heart is. The door will always be wide open but I can’t deny that I’m refusing to cross that threshold right now.

I have changed, they have changed, the world has changed but I have learned something that’s much greater than the constant of change- it’s choice.

I get to choose what to invest my life in and who to invest it with. I don’t need others to evaluate me when I can determine the value of myself perfectly. I appreciate who I am, what I can offer and what I want from the life I live.

Some things I can’t control, like the curling tides or the inclement weather. But some things I can master and that is the ship I will certainly sail.

There was a moment where I mourned for the days of a time long past. I know now that I deserved better and their loss is my fortune of freedom. Life isn’t about blindly devoting yourself to serving others but for finding meaning in the service we give.

There are some people in the world who are so cruel that they will take and take and demand more. As if your contribution was never enough, as though you were never enough, but the true deficiency lies in the crooked world they build and the weak structures they support.

I am not lonely without them, but rather at peace with myself. The mind is one’s sanctuary for the soul. Nourish it, look after it and fill it with memories that make all the hardship make sense. Bad memories can haunt us like angry ghosts. When we are stuck swimming in the waters of the past, we eventually drown in the present and our futures are lost to the abyss of the great ocean.

I chose to overcome bitterness and move forward, I chose to be courageous, I chose to be who I’ve always wanted to be. My ambitions will only take me so far but the pursuit of it makes every breath worth breathing.